The Burden of Gratitude

Lately I have been reminded that I have so much to be thankful for. It is like a burden of gratitude. When I think about what the Lord has done in my life, how He has blessed me, and where He has brought me it brings me to tears. I am not sure if burden is the best word, but I just can't stop thinking about all He has done and it is weighing on my heart. 

One thing I love about life is learning from others, especially others that have paved the way for me to be where I am today. When I hear amazing stories of the heroes of faith in the Bible, missionaries, and Pastors from years ago, I am blown away. They followed the call of God with nothing more than their faith, and I mean nothing! I have been in Costa Rica going on two months now and I can honestly say that I would be lost without technology, without a connection to home, or without a phone call to comfort. So how did they do it? Was faith enough to say that they would leave everything they know and everyone they love just because God said so to? I thought thats what I did, but it doesn't compare. I have heard stories of missionaries that would travel for months just to arrive in a village or country, to learn a language that had never been translated, to live on bread alone, only to receive news months or even years later of loved ones passing away. Sometimes I just feel selfish. I have so much. I have a Facebook to keep me updated every second with news from home. I have family and friends who can hop on a plane if I need them and be here in just a few hours. I'm in a school of language in which every preposition and pronoun will be taught to me by incredible teachers. Every resource imaginable is available and yet at times find myself treating it like its not enough.


It is 2011 and there are still millions of people around the world living with nothing. Barely breathing! How dare I be so selfish? I have so much and others have so little. Right now in Africa there is a serious drought killing thousands. Millions are homeless, abused, and hurting. There are children all over the world that will go to sleep tonight without food, without water, a home, and without someone to love them. This may not be news to you, but it is very easy to just become numb to it. It is so easy to live a life without gratitude. We can be so consumed with our own lives that we forget the overwhelming needs of others. We can also forget to appreciate that somewhere, someone paved the way and prayed for us to be where we are today. And most importantly that God sent His son to die for us so that we may be loved and love others. 


At times I can't comprehend how God loves me as much as He does. It seems like He should be unreachable so He can spend more time on people who need Him more. I don't know what its like to be persecuted like the heroes of faith, to live with radical tenacious faith like missionaries in the past, to go to sleep without anyone to love me, to starve, or to beg, yet I still have the opportunity to love Him.  


The Bible says in Matthew 5 that,

3“Blessed are the poor in spirit,

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4Blessed are those who mourn,

for they will be comforted.

5Blessed are the meek,

for they will inherit the earth.

6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,

for they will be filled.

7Blessed are the merciful,

for they will be shown mercy.

8Blessed are the pure in heart,

for they will see God.

9Blessed are the peacemakers,

for they will be called sons of God.

10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

I may not be Mrs. America and I don't have an answer to end world hunger but I do know how to cling to the word of God for answers. I believe that God will take care of His people and that His promises are forever. He is the hope for the hopeless and a father to the fatherless. He brings comfort when we need it. He has more than enough love for each of us, and it is His love that conquers all. I could not be more thankful for this burden of gratitude especially at this time in my life. I refuse to take this opportunity for granted. It is my desire to do my best in all that God has called me to do.  And one day in Heaven I will have an opportunity to really say thank you to the people that paved the way, to those that lived without. I will thank them because their faith and their lives push me to out of bed every day. Their stories compel me to fight for God's purpose in my life and in the lives of others, and most importantly they have compelled me to fall more in love with Jesus than ever before. 


Our life of poverty is as necessary as the work itself. Only in heaven will we see how much we owe to the poor for helping us to love God better because of them. 
Mother Teresa